


Insanely Cool Anywhere But Here

by Stubbornness_and_Spite



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: AU: minor past changes that don't affect BMC and will affect DEH, BMC took place in junior year, Butterfly Effect, DEH took place in senior year, F/M, Gen, Happy Ending?, Jeremy Heere is Jared Kleinman AU, Recreational Drug Use, Relationships based on what is written so far and subject to change, Underage Drug Use, its pot, pot is the drug, rated for language and drug use, tags based on what is written so far and subject to change, what if they were consecutive years?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-21
Updated: 2020-03-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:48:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23237962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stubbornness_and_Spite/pseuds/Stubbornness_and_Spite
Summary: When the pressure of expectations and the reputation as the kid who drugged the cast of the school play gets to be too much, Jeremy goes to where he's always gone to be someone else: Rochester, NY.Jeremy Heere lives in New Jersey with his single dad and one friend(well, maybe more now)Jared Kleinman lives in New York with his single mom and ton of insanely cool friends(well, maybe just one)The only problem? They're the same person.
Relationships: Evan Hansen & Jared Kleinman, Evan Hansen & Jeremy Heere, Jared Kleinman & Connor Murphy, Jared Kleinman & Michael Mell, Jeremy Heere & Connor Murphy (Dear Evan Hansen), Jeremy Heere & Michael Mell
Comments: 5
Kudos: 24





	Insanely Cool Anywhere But Here

**Author's Note:**

> In case you were curious, the full title is: Cool in College? How About Insanely Cool Anywhere But Here?
> 
> I've got a tiny bit more of this pre-written/planned but not much. I figured I'd post while I had an undetermined amount of time at home and see which of my ideas other people were interested in. Also, I've been craving new content with the various forms of self-quarantine and cancellations in my community so I thought I'd provide some to someone else.
> 
> Also, the next chapter is in present tense and all-around better if you're willing to stick around while I drop a ton of exposition for this AU in the first chapter

Jeremy was nervous, sitting in the passenger seat of Michael’s PT Cruiser as they crossed the border into New York. Jeremy was really glad his dad had agreed to let Michael drive him to his mom’s house in Rochester. His parents had split when he was still in sixth grade and he’d spent summers with his mom in New York ever since. Jeremy had ended up living with his dad partially so that he wouldn’t have to move to another school system and state and away from Michael. Last summer, when Jeremy had left New Jersey, Michael hadn’t had his license yet but had promised that he would drive Jeremy the next summer. The next summer had come and gone, but Jeremy had stayed in New Jersey. He had too many relationships to mend to leave the state for three months. Evan had been disappointed that Jeremy had decided not to come to New York over the summer, but had still been excited to text him all the details of his job as an apprentice park ranger at Ellison State Park. Jeremy had considered introducing Evan to his friends, especially after they had figured out where they all stood in the aftermath of the Squips, but he’d decided not to. Evan wasn’t the best with meeting new people, especially when it wasn’t on his terms and Jeremy didn’t want Evan to think he was replacing him. He’d kind of regretted not introducing Evan and Michael years ago, but at this point, it felt like it was almost too late. He wasn’t sure, but Jeremy wouldn’t be surprised if Evan was offended or upset at Jeremy pulling a ‘best friend for twelve years’ out of his pocket. 

“Jeremy, you okay?” Michael asked, his eyebrows drawn together. “You look like you’re getting in your own head.”

Jeremy shrugged. “Bit nervous,” he admitted. “Evan doesn’t know I’m coming for the school year this time.”

Michael raised his eyebrows and frowned. “Yeah, but from what you’ve told me, I don’t think Evan is going to become an asshole because you surprised him.” He breathed out heavily. “So what’s bothering you?” Jeremy didn’t respond. “We’ve got four hours left on the road, Jer. I can and will pester you the entire way.”

Jeremy laughed. “I’m going to be at a different school than you,” he whined. “We haven’t been in different schools ever; who am I supposed to make life a two-player game with now?”

Michael rolled his eyes. “Me, asshole. You do own a phone, right?”

Jeremy scowled good-naturedly. “Yes.”

Michael laughed. “I am in your contacts list, right?”

“At the top.”

Michael’s smile softened. “You’ll be fine, Jer. Promise.”

Jeremy leaned across the car and put his head on Michael’s shoulder. “I’m just going to miss my favorite person.”

Michael shoved him off, snickering. “Yeah, yeah, me too. That’s why I’m driving a twelve-hour round trip to spend more time with you before I have to go an entire school year without seeing you.” He punched Jeremy in the arm without looking at him. “You’re lucky your mom offered to pay me gas money.” 

Jeremy punched him back, causing the car to swerve slightly. After Michael righted the car he said, “You know you’d be here anyway.”

“Shut up, I would.”

* * *

Michael had stayed the night at the Kleinman house before starting the drive back to New Jersey the next day. Jeremy had really wanted him to stay a few days but they had already pushed the drive off until the last minute and Michael would be starting school the day after he arrived back home. Jeremy had a few days to settle in since school in New York started a day after New Jersey, but that was just another day to miss Michael and his other friends before he had school to distract him. He considered texting Evan, but he’d already committed to surprising him so he decided to follow through and not tell Evan that he was here until the first day of school. He opened WhatsApp and stared at his contacts. It wasn’t a wholly unfamiliar list, but it wasn’t the one he used most of the time. 

_ Mom _

_ Evan Hansen _

_ HeidiH _

Damn, that was a short contact list. He looked at his own username, JKleinman, and reminded himself that he wasn’t in New Jersey anymore. He wasn’t going to graduate with the Squip Squad, but he was going to be there at their graduation. He’d already made plans for his dad to drive him back the day after his own graduation so that he could be there when his friends graduated. He selected Heidi’s contact.

**_HeidiH_ **

**JKleinman:** Do you know Evan’s locker number? I haven’t told him I’m here for the school year and want to surprise him at his locker on the first day

**HeidiH:** Oh, Jared, that’s so sweet! I think he said it’s 301. He definitely said it was right outside the guidance office. 

**JKleinman:** Thanks, Heidi! Don’t tell Evan I said hi ;p

**HeidiH:** He’ll see you in school, honey.

Jeremy closed the app and grinned. He wondered if Heidi remembered his name wasn’t actually Jared. When they were younger, Evan had heard Jeremy’s mom call him Jer and assumed his name was Jared. Jeremy was pretty sure that Evan had been reading a book at the time that had a character named Jared who’d gone by Jare in it, but he’d never asked and Evan never shared. Jeremy didn’t remember exactly how old they’d been but he remembered being in early elementary school. He’d been almost more awkward as a kid than he was now and had been too nervous to correct Evan at first. Eventually, his mom had realized that Evan thought his name was Jared and offered to correct Evan or mention it to Heidi, but by that point Jeremy had started to like it. It was almost like a nickname. He didn’t have to be the awkward Jeremy Heere with one friend. When he was with Evan he could be… The Insanely Cool Jared Kleinman. It was fun and since he was only ever there for the summer he didn’t have to worry about other people’s opinions besides Evan’s and he could just be cool. That was who he’d wanted to be when he got the Squip, but that had gone… too far. He was drawn from his thoughts by a text alert. 

**_Squip Squad - Brooke, Chloe, Jenna, Rich, Christine, Jake, Player1_ **

Only Michael’s contact name wasn’t his actual name. Jeremy had considered setting other names for the rest of his friends, but had decided against it. He thought he might change them later, but Michael was his best friend of twelve years and Jeremy didn’t want him to think that he was being replaced or was any less important. Also Jeremy didn’t have nicknames or events to reference with the others yet.

**_Squip Squad_ **

**_Brooke:_ ** Jere-bear! How’s NY?!

**_Rich:_ ** Michael won’t tell us anything good

**_Player1:_ ** Michael is in the chat you rooster fucking tiny creature

**_Rich:_ ** Wtf, Mell? Are you ok?

He just drove 12 hours with only like 4 hours of sleep in the middle

If he speaks like an actual human being within the next three days mark the calendars

**_Jake:_ ** Damn, J

**_Jake:_ ** Harsh

He just drove 12 hours with only like 4 hours of sleep in the middle and I love him for it?

**_Player1:_ ** Acceptable

**_Chloe:_ ** Enough about Michael! We want to know about NY!

**_Jenna:_ ** D - E - T - A - I - L - S

There’s none to tell, guys

I’m surprising my one friend in NY in school on the 5th

My mom made spaghetti for dinner

**_Rich:_ ** Lame, tall-ass

Fuck you guys! There’s nothing to tell!

**_Christine:_ ** Tell us you miss us?

Aw, Christine!

I already miss you guys. Don’t remind me!

I should go. My mom wants to hear about my school year and what made me decide to come to NY for senior year and I’m not sure what to tell her

**_Christine:_ ** The truth?

**_Rich:_ ** Do you think she’d take the truth well?

**_Jenna:_ ** If you decide to lie, tell us what you say

**_Jake:_ ** We’ll back you up

**_Jenna:_ ** And I can make it true

**_Brooke:_ ** Um, Jenna…

**_Brooke:_ ** That sounds a little threatening

**_Jenna:_ ** It was meant to

**_Chloe:_ ** That’s Jenna for ‘we love and support you, Jeremy’

I know. Thanks guys

I think I’m going to go with the truth, but if she doesn’t take it well…

I guess I’ll figure something out

**_Brooke:_ ** Tell her the play was ecstacy and the Squip was an abusive ex if she doesn’t believe you

**_Chloe:_ ** She’ll be able to help with your squip-backs that way 

**_Jake:_ ** Squip-backs?

**_Brooke:_ ** Squip flashbacks

**_Jenna:_ ** Obviously

**_Rich:_ ** Yeah, Jake. Obviously

**_Jake:_ ** You shut up, Goranski

Guys!

I’m muting this chat

I’ll turn it back on in the morning

Or if the talk with my mom goes really bad

Just text me directly if anyone needs me

~

Jeremy turned off the alerts and closed his text messages before he could get flooded with goodbyes and responses or get sucked into a conversation. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, counting on the inhale and exhale, a technique that Heidi had taught him to help Evan that he’d ended up using himself more often than with Evan. He dropped his phone on his bed and made his way downstairs to tell his mom all she’d missed while he was in New Jersey.

* * *

She’d taken it well. Jeremy would have been surprised at how well she’d taken the information if she hadn’t mentioned that his dad had already filled her in to an extent. 

“Jer?” Jeremy looked over at his mom. “You doing okay, kiddo?”

Jeremy laughed. “Uh, n-no?”

She stood up from the kitchen table where they were sitting and walked over to put an arm around his shoulders. She guided him into the living room and sat them down on the couch. She wrapped her arms around him and let him cry without guilt. He couldn’t let himself just break down like this in front of anyone back in New Jersey, not after all he had hurt them, even if he was hurting while he did it, but he hadn’t hurt his mom, not with the Squip, so he could accept her sympathy without feeling guilty for it. This was part of the reason he’d needed to go to New York. He’d apologized all he could and everyone had forgiven him, except him. Jeremy hadn’t forgiven himself and he needed to get away from all the damage he’d done to have a chance at doing that.

“It’s going to be okay, Jare- _ Jeremy, _ sorry.”

Jeremy laughed again. He sat upright. “Jared’s fine, mom. I’ve been going by Jared with everyone here since elementary school. And honestly, I don’t really like Jeremy right now. He’s been kind of a jerk.”

Jeremy’s mom rubbed his back. “Distancing yourself isn’t the same as forgiving yourself, kiddo,” she whispered.

“I know.” Jeremy shrugged. “I think I need to figure out how to like myself again before I can forgive myself though.” He wasn’t sure how long he laid on the couch and let his mom hug him, but eventually, he felt her yawn, which made him yawn. “M-maybe we should get some sleep. I’m starting school tomorrow.”

Jeremy’s mom guided him up as she stood. “Sleep well,” she wished him as she kissed the top of his head. Jeremy grinned as he made his way up the stairs and flopped on his bed. He grabbed his phone, glancing over the 126 new messages since he’d last looked at it. Without reading any he sent a text.

**_Squip Squad_ **

Talk with mom went good. She believed me.


End file.
